Fanboy Comments! - The Fanboy Comics Newsletter

THIS! IS! SPARTA! WE! TAKE! A! LONG! TIME! TO! SAY! THINGS!

Here's one of the great door prizes you could win: a copy of the 300 Graphic Novel!

I think this graphic novel contains a lot more genitals than the movie Oh man, this is awesome. It's filled with action, heroism, and super-manly manliness for men who are manly. Seriously, though, if the movie is half as good as this book, it will rock. If you never gave a crap about Sparta or the Battle of Thermopylae or whatever, you will now, because it turns out history is really cool. Maybe this will get more people reading books about history and the fascinating things that have happened in history! Probably not, though. So, while it perhaps isn't an instrument to spark an intellectual revolution, it's still a damn good read. Also, it is really manly as hell. There are just men everywhere being really manly.

Well have I got a deal for you! Fanboy Comics will be giving away free movie tickets at our upcoming events, courtesy of Mayfaire Cinemas! We have several events coming up where the first few people to register get free movie tickets! Check our schedule for a complete list.

Apparently, I'm doing such a good job at copying and pasting marketing blurbs from Diamond's website, Thomas wants me to do it for five books this week! I consider "having more work to do" to be a curious reward for doing good work, but that's okay. I'll just become more surly at work as a response. Here's what's coming out tomorrow:

book one was about a gunslinger guy. book two is apparently about french kissing spiders. what an odd turn for the plot to take The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger Born #2

Did you like The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger Born #1? Well, odds are you'll like this second issue, also about the same character with the same artist and the same writers! Don't ask me how I might be able to make this deduction; let's just say I use the same methods as Sherlock Holmes: voodoo magic. Anyway, even if you're illiterate, this book is worth picking up just for Jae Lee's beautiful, beautiful art, featuring Richard Isanove's beautiful, beautiful colors. The dialogue is good, too, but whatever. Pretty much anything after the art is just a bonus.

I SURE DON'T HATE JOSS WHEDON Buffy: The Vampire Slayer #1

Season Eight of Buffy Begins Here!
What do you do when your cult TV show is cancelled, but you still have a bunch of loose ends to wrap up? Why, you make comic book and declare it to be an official part of the series "canon." Some of you might not know quite what "canon" means, which pretty much guarantees you have never written any fanfiction. Good for you! Essentially, it means that when you are arguing about whether or not a character could beat another character in a fight, only information that is "canon" is relevant to the discussion. So if, for example, Buffy learns to shoot lasers out of her eyes in some random issue of a non-canon comic, you can't use that as an argument for why she would beat Captain Picard in a fight. However, if it were to happen in a "canon" comic book, like this new issue of Buffy, it would be valid! Isn't that great? No, it isn't.

wow, brian michael bendis writing two team books? fantastic, provided we live in the alternate universe where brian michael bendis can write team books. The Mighty Avengers #1

What do you get when you put the most powerful characters in the Marvel Universe on a team? Well, this. Featuring Iron Man, The Sentry, Wonder Man, Ms. Marvel, and Ares, this team is a real set of bruisers. Also, there is the Black Widow and the Wasp, for some reason. I can't really imagine any situation where someone says, "This villain is too powerful for the Sentry! If only we had a woman who could shrink and a woman with a gun! Curse, you fickle fate! Fie, fie I say!" Also, Wonder Man might be worthless but I don't know anything about his powers and I've already looked at wikipedia too much today.

i'm pretty sure i read this on fanfiction.net first Marvel Zombies vs. Army of Darkness #1

Following the smash hit success Marvel Zombies is this prequel to the series, which inexplicably features cult icon Ashley J. Williams from the Evil Dead movies. I guess there is some sort of reason that this happened, but I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what it is. Still, I suppose there are worse crossover characters. Spawn, for instance. Buffy the Vampire Slayer would also be pretty dumb. Tank Girl, also stupid. Darth Vader would not make very much sense, either. I would read Marvel Zombies vs. Robocop, though. That might be cool.

civil war the initiative is based on iron man's dexterity bonus plus any feats Civil War: The Initiative

The new face of the Marvel Universe is revealed here, with stories by Brian Michael Bendis and Warren Ellis, and art by Mark Silvestri. To quote Marvel's exclamation-point-laden blurb on Diamond's website: "The post war Marvel Universe begins here! The war is over!! Let the healing begin!! This all-new special written by Brian Bendis, especially for modern legend Marc Silvestri, debuts the all new IRON MAN, OMEGA FLIGHT, MIGHTY AVENGERS, NEW AVENGERS and with a special chapter written by Warren Ellis...THUNDERBOLTS! Each chapter is an important all-new prologue for each of these huge new series!" Personally, I would prefer a blurb that doesn't sound like it was written by a hyperactive twelve-year-old, but we take what we can get. I've written enough of these things at this point where I can just copy and paste Marvel's ridiculously excited blurb. Or, as Marvel would say, "Copy and paste...MARVEL'S RIDICULOUSLY EXCITED BLURB!!"

CAST MAGIC MISSILE

Featuring FREE FIRST FRIDAYS: Free tournaments on the first Friday of every month! For every player who shows up, we throw a booster into the pot, winner take all! We also run Constructed Tournaments, Raid Deck Tournaments, and Open Play, featuring great prize support like rare cards, playmats, extended art, tresure/loot packs, signed artist proofs, movie tickets, and more!

Saturday, March 10th: Sealed Event - The first five players to register get free movie tickets to Mayfaire Cinemas!

Saturday, March 24th: Tournament - Winner gets a sealed box and an artist proof card signed by Tom Fleming! What is an artist proof card? Why, it's a card like the one below, but with a blank back:

those bastards at upper deck cut out the hot night elf chick. have they ever been on a world of warcraft forum?

COMING APRIL 14th: Through the Dark Portal Release Celebration! Featuring a sealed event for Through the Dark Portal, the newest expansion for the World of Warcraft TCG. More information coming next week!

Every year, Fanboy Comics likes to celebrate the holiday most intricately connected to our favorite hobby: alocoholism. So, to celebrate, we're offering great specials on green superheroes! We'll be giving 50% Off Back Issues, Trade Paperbacks, and Hardcovers featuring green superheroes like the Hulk, Green Lantern, Green Arrow, and Swamp Thing, and we'll have Green T-Shirts 50% off! So be here to argue with us if the brief appearance of Triathlon in a particular Avengers trade paperback makes it a "green comic." Maybe somebody working here will be drunk enough to agree!

remember this nightmare

Join us at Fanboy Comics for our expanded Free Comic Book weekend at both Fanboy Comics and Mayfaire Cinemas for Spider-Man 3! More information to come soon; if your school or organization would like to get free comics to give away, please contact us as soon as possible as we only have a limited amount. Either call us at (910) 452-7828, or email us at fanboycomics@bellsouth.net. It is vital that you contact us!

And now, as a service to the community: The Editor Reviews a Free Comic Book Day Title Based Entirely On the Cover and Whatever is Wikipedia's Featured Article of the Day!

This Week: Legion of Super-Heroes in the 31st Century and The Battle of Ceresole

'We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.' According to Wikipedia, "Ceresole was one of the few pitched battles during the latter half of the Italian Wars." Of course, everyone knows that, but what does it mean in relation to the comic Legion of Super-Heroes in the 31st Century? It would appear that none of the characters on the cover of this book are of Italian descent. The only one with the obvious firey latin passion and confidence that are natural to that region is the character in the center, who clearly is some iteration of Superman, and therefore from Krypton. Perhaps this is merely a sign that, in the future, all Kryptonians are considered to be of Italian descent, so as not to further complicate the "race" question on standardized tests, especially considering how rare Kryptonians are. It makes a kind of bureaucratic sense, especially when one considers the allegory between the instability of Italy's government and the instability of Krypton's core, but who among us can truly know the truth?

the card art used in this flyer is from the cards serra angel, hypnotic spectre, leviathan, ernham djinn, and shivan dragon. i couldn't find any good copies of the old card art i remember except for the shivan dragon. i guess that shows why they changed the card art - it was terrible

NEW Player's Choice Tournaments! The players can choose one of the following tournaments:

Booster Draft - $13 Entry
How a Booster Draft Works: Each player gets three packs, and all players sit around a table in a circle. Each player opens a pack, selects a card from it, and then passes the remaining cards to the player next to him, who in turn selects a card and passes the remaining on to the next player. After all the cards have been drafted, each player makes a deck from the cards he has and plays in a single-elimination tournament where the winner gets about 1.5 packs per participant!

Type I or II Constructed - $5 Entry
Type I Format (Vintage) - All cards are legal, excepting certain cards that are banned (not permitted) or restricted (limited to one per deck). The banned and restricted lists for Type I are available on Wizards of the Coast’s website at www.wizards.com.
Type II Format (Standard) - Only the most recent core set and two most recent blocks are legal.
First Prize - $50.00 Store Credit
Second Prize - $20.00 Store Credit

What Is DCI Sanctioning?
DCI Sanctioning is a program set up by Wizards of the Coast to record match results and provide support for the Magic: The Gathering playerbase. Participants in DCI Events will be given national ratings and be eligible for special offers from Wizards of the Coast. DCI Sanctioning also supplies the venue with rare foil promotional cards for players. Like, for example, this one:

(something about osteoperosis)

DC Heroclix: Origins

$7.99 per pack

Everyone has an Origin. DC HeroClix: Origin unveils a new Golden Age of 3D superhero gaming. Relive classic battles or build your own myths in the epic DC Universe-the possibilities are endless! Exploding with cool retro costumes, sharp new looks, and the hottest heroes and villains, DC HeroClix: Origin is a must have for any comic book fan. Demonstrating yet again that HeroClix is the must have game for real comic book fans, DC HeroClix: Origin brings both the latest characters from the current 52 storyline and the Golden Age appearances of your favorite superheroes together for the first time on the field of battle. DC HeroClix: Origin encompasses almost 70 years of comic book adventures, including the first appearance of many sought-after characters like Alan Scott, the original Green Lantern! DC HeroClix: Origin kicks off the 5th Anniversary of HeroClix in a big way!

Thanks for that information, WizKids Marketing Stooge! Unfortunately, you forgot to mention some of the cooler stuff like the Golden Age Superman (no flight!) and characters like Mr. Mind and Shazam! Seriously, this set is pretty awesome.

Dungeons and Dragons Miniatures: Unhallowed

$14.99 per pack

This latest D&D Miniatures Game release includes several infamous D&D characters and popular D&D monsters. Undead and other creatures of darkness figure prominently in the set. Various figures are drawn from key D&D titles, including the Expanded Psionic Handbook and various Eberron and Forgotten Realms supplements. Four miniatures—one per faction—also have a second stat card that features epic-level statistics specifically for high-level versions of those figures.

Booster Pack Components:

Eight randomized, pre-painted, plastic miniatures
Stat cards for each miniature, including a second epic-level stat card with certain figures
An Unhallowed set checklist

Thanks for the information, Unknown Wizards of the Coast Marketing Stooge! I like to think we're friends, he and I.

Ex Machina Vol. 5: Smoke Smoke

$12.99

Ex Machina is one of the best comic books on shelves now. It seamlessly combines a "political hot topic of the week" format with a fascinating and intriguing superhero story, with constant unexpected twists and turns and great characterization. Not only is it a political book, but it's not preachy! It takes an even-handed stance on a great deal of issues and never outright tells you what to believe. I don't really know what's in this volume because I don't read the issues, but I'm going to be picking it up as soon as it comes out. If anyone deserves your blind faith in him, it's Brian K. Vaughan.

Batman 2006 Magnets

personally I never really associated batman with a freeware graffiti font but that's just me

$3.50 each

Magnets are nature's sticky paper, except they only work on things that are specific types of metal. I'd probably know more if I hadn't dropped out of high school, but that's in the past and I can't change it now. Anyway, if you have some sort of magnetic surface of some sort, and you want a picture of Batman to be attached to it, you can't go wrong with these magnets. Fortunately, there are several of these magnets that don't feature the inexplicable choice of a stencil font and a pseudo-graffiti font, so you can buy those. And if you are a big fan of freeware fonts, then I guess the other ones might be up your alley.

James Kochalka Superstar: Spread Your Evil Wings and Fly

james kochalka is a superstar as far as i'm concerned

$15.98

I'm not all that familiar with James Kochalka, but here's some random quotes about it from Thomas:

"IT'S AWESOME."

"He sings a song about the clouds getting high."

"He sings the Justin Timberlake song." In Falsetto: "Justin Timberlake, Justin Timberlake, Justin Timberlaaaake!"

"I would pay fifty dollars for a James Kolchaka CD!"

There we go!

Exalted: The Compass of Celestial Directions Book 2: The Wyld

thanks to white wolf for making the title to this book, and all of their exalted books, ridiculously long

$24.99

White Wolf is a lot better at describing books I haven't read than I am. Here, take a look:

Outside the bounds of Creation, there exists an infinite expanse of roiling chaos that breaks upon the shaped world like a stormtossed sea against the shore, threatening to wear it away. Where it does wear away, reality breaks down and savage denizens of the chaos beyond Creation dwell.

The second of five Celestial Direction books devoted to fleshing out the bare bones of Creation’s supernatural locales presented in the Exalted core book, this book includes:

Details of the dangers of the Wyld, the kingdoms of the Fair Folk and the savage Wyld tribes
Full rules for power-questing and mutations
Traits for the Wyld’s native inhabitants

10 percent is a lot of discount

what the heck is a cur anyway

Thomas wants me to post some results, but all I know is that Farciane got beat. So there you go, results.

The season ends April 2nd, so there's still plenty of time to get in some games!

Here are just a few of the many great items we have available on E-bay! We start new auctions every Monday at 6:00 PM that last through Saturday at 6:00 PM. Local customers can bid and pick up their purchase at the store to save on shipping! We also add new items to our E-bay Store every Wednesday and Thursday. We currently have over 1000 items, including pulps, vintage paperbacks, handbills, comics, and more!

yes, thanks to the magic of ebay, you can be the proud owner of leonard maltin's 1993 movie guide Movie Book Lot of 5

This auction contains a lot of 5 Books about film:

Movie Guide to Action/Adventure Video Tapes and Discs by the editors of Video Times Magazine. Published by Signet in 1985. (VG+) condition or better.
Leonard Maltin's Movie and Video Guide 1993. Published by Signet in 1992, 1st printing. Contains over 1500 pages of film titles, directors, actors, and tons more. (VG) condition with some lite spine creasing and lite edge wear.
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang by Pauline Kael. Published by Bantam Books in 1969. Nice shape. Some spots of discoloration on covers and interior covers.
Golden Turkey Awards: Worst Achievements in Hollywood History by Harry and Michael Medved. Published by Berkley in 1981. Very funny book!! Nice shape. Some lite creasing along spine and lite edge wear.
Science Fiction in the Cinema by John Baxter. Complete review of Sci-Fi films, fron A Trip to the Moon (1902) to 2001: Space Oyssey and fully illustrated. Published by Paperback Library in 1970, 1st printing. Great shape!

Overall, books with high eye appeal. Don't miss out on these hard-to-find items.

we don't mention it, but i hear this book has nice eye appeal Science Fantasty Pulp Digest Lot of 4

This auction contains the vintage pulp digest Science Fantasy

Vol.9 #27, published in 1958. Cover by Lewis. Content highlights include: Valley Beyond Time by Robert Silverberg, Judas Danced by John Rackman, The Converts by Bertram Chandler.......plus lots more!! Overall, this rare book is in (GD+) condition or better with lite spine wear and lite edge and corner wear. Nice interior! this book has nice eye appeal.

Vol.10 #28, published in 1958. Cover by Lewis. Content highlights include: Return Visit by E.C. Tubb, Out of Control by Kenneth Bulmer, The Carp that Once by Brian W. Aldiss.......plus lots more!! Overall, this rare book is in (GD) condition or better with moderate spine wear and moderate creasing on front cover. There's also a book store stamp on front cover.

Vol.10 #29, published in 1958. Cover by Lewis. Content highlights include: Fresh Guy by E.C. Tubb, Earth is But a Star by John Brunner, BLighted Profile by Brian W. Aldiss.......plus lots more!! Overall, this rare book is in (FN-) condition or better with very slight corner and spine wear. Nice interior.

Vol.10 #30, published in 1958. Cover by Lewis. Content highlights include: Smile, Please! by Brian W. Aldiss, Destiny Incorporated by John Kippax, A Sense of Proportion by Clifford C. Reed.......plus lots more!! Overall, this rare book is in (VG-) condition or better with lite edge and corner wear. Nice interior.

Don't miss out on this very rare book!!

Actually, I'm just a melodramatic whiner! Here are the new comic sets we've put out this week:

Comic Sets: X-Men: The Hidden Years #1-22 (Complete Series), Wild Thing #1-5, X-Men: Liberators #1-4 (Miniseries), XSE #1-4 (Bishop Miniseries), Professor Xavier and the X-Men #1-7, X-Men: Phoenix #1-3 (Miniseries), X-Men/Alpha Flight #1-2 (Miniseries), X-Men: True Friends #1-3 (Miniseries), Youngblood #0-5, Uncanny X-Men #395-398 (Poptopia Parts 1-4), X-Men Forever #1-6 (Complete Series), X-Men: Magik #1-4 (Complete Miniseries), X-Men: Children of the Atom #1-6, X-Treme X-Men: Savage Land #1-4, X-Treme X-Men #1-9 (Regular Series), X-Men: Hellfire Club, Wolverine/Punisher: Revelation #1-4 (Miniseries), Wolverine/Hulk #1-4 (Complete Miniseries), Wolverine #119-122 (Not Dead Yet Parts 1-4), Wolverine #133-138 (Great Escape Parts 1-6), Wolverine: Days of Future Past #1-3 (Miniseries), X-Nation #1-6 (Complete Series)

there is no joke on this flyer

imagine a world where this flyer doesn't suck (yeah, I can't either)

this was pretty much the best idea I could come up with

BUT WAIT: TODAY IS OPPOSITE DAY!

We are all about buying used Trade Paperbacks and Hardcovers. In fact, the mere notion that we do not buy these things should be so ludicrous as to inspire you to immediately call the mental hospital and tell them they need to come and take me away! Of course, we also buy Silver Age Comics (Stuff published on or before 1977), Old Records, Old Pulps, Used Roleplaying Games, and Yu-Gi-Oh and Magic: The Gathering Cards. Give us a call at (910) 452-7828 to set up an appointment!

we don't actually have that issue

what a lazy coupon

NEOS STRIKES

So here we are, two weeks after the originally announced date for the conclusion of our annual awards, the TBD's. We got exactly one response. I can't say I'm particularly surprised, or even disappointed, since writing e-mail is apparently a lot of work. Considering how challenging it was to get my fellow employees to fill out their ballots, I should have really done something to make the process easier for you, the incredibly lazy reader. Unfortunately, I don't know how to make a fancy internet form, and by the time I came up with the idea, it was too late to realistically implement it. Here's what went right:

1. A year-end awards ceremony was a good idea.
2. The graphics were pretty good.
3. It was fairly visually involving.

Here's what went wrong:

1. It turns out nobody reads the newsletter.

I would be remiss not to mention that we did get two entries, from Gary Francisco and Brad Mercier. Thanks to Brad and Gary, for actually giving two good goddamns about this. I guess you two win the TBD's. Here are Brad and Gary's--and, by extension, everyone's--picks.

failure, as depicted by a png file

Gary Francisco:

Best Cover - Nord Free Comic Book Day Conan
Best New Comic Series - Nextwave
Best Single Issue - Detective #826
Best Miniseries - American Way
Best Story Arc - Planet Hulk
Best Moment - Punisher killing people - starting with Stilt Man!
Best Original Graphic Novel - George R.R. Martin's Hedgeknight
Best Collection - Absolute Watchmen
Best Comic-Based Movie/DVD/TV Show - Teen Titans Go! (my son's vote)
Best Indie Book - Mouse Guard
Best Hero - Captain America
Best Villain - Joker
Best Babe - Spiderwoman
Best Artist - Cary Nord
Best Writer - Warren Ellis
Best Ongoing Series - Ultimate Fantastic Four
Best Roleplaying Game Product - Expedition to Castle Ravenloft
Best Collectible Card Game Product - don't know, don't care
Best Miniatures Product - don't know, don't care

Brad Mercier:

Best Cover - 52 Week 18
Best New Comic Series - The Irredeemable Ant-Man
Best Single Issue - The Thing #8
Best Miniseries - Doctor Strange : The Oath (Some of this came out in '06,right?)
Best Story Arc - "A Different World", Invincible.
Best Ongoing Series - Invincible
Best Moment - Myself getting a special shout-out from writer Dan Slott in She-Hulk #12
Best Original Graphic Novel - Pride of Bagdhad
Best Collection - Invincible Ultimate Collection Vol. 2
Best Comic-Based Movie/DVD/TV Show - Does "Heroes" count? It's made people respect superheroes a lot more in the mainstream.
Best Indie Comic - Mouse Guard or Scott Pilgrim
Best Hero - Invincible. The powers of Superman with the attitude of Spider-Man, yet his own person. His comic is the most-classic and most-modern book out there, and he's really the next great super-hero. I don't doubt he'll one day be considered a classic.
Best Villain - Zombies, or whatever plagues the souls of the characters in The Walking Dead. Really the villians might not be the zombies, but the survivors themselves. I'm not sure the zombies HELP matters though.
Best Comic Babe - She-Hulk. she needs to get some respect. She's more interesting with her cousin, she's smart, a lawyer who deals with superhuman law, and her book brings werewolves, (awesome) androids, Thanos, and The Two-Gun kid all into one story - And it makes sense. And is the best series starring a female hero out there.
Best Artist - Ryan Ottley. Screw Steve McNiven. Ottley lays down the LAW on Invincible. His pencils are off the chart, insanely fun to look at. he can do anything, make anything look interesting. And some of his layouts are stupendous. The 2 page spread of Omni-Man and Invincible vs. The Viltruminates? Killer.
Best Writer - Robert Kirkman and Dan Slott. I can't choose one over the other. They're both just too good. Screw Bendis.

I guess everything Brad and Gary voted for is tied for first place in the voting. And be sure to pick up our readers' favorite miniatures game, "don't know, don't care."

snikt bub bub snikt bub snikt snikt

Wolverine by Claremont and Miller HC

Writer: Chris Claremont
Artists: Frank Miller & Paul Smith
Inkers: Josef Rubinstein & Bob Wiacek
Colorist: Glynis Wein
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Price: $19.99

In this collection's introduction, 16-year Uncanny X-Men writer Chris Claremont offers a dead-on explanation of Wolverine as a character: "[He] is almost a primal life force, totally beyond control, as graceless as can be." Claremont goes on to explain how Wolvie is a duel creature; half-animal, half pure human instinct. Claremont, who logged a 16-year run on Uncanny X-Men (the longest, undisputed run on an American comic title), also explains the way he and artist Frank Miller approached constructing Wolverine's first solo (mini) series. The plot isn't what's guiding the characters through the story. Rather, the goal for the creators here was to take Wolverine, who by the early 1980s had become a rational and expected lethal enforcer, and completely reinvent. Claremont and Miller chose to send Wolverine on a Japanese adventure that seeks to break him down to base instinct by unleashing a violent beast and allowing Logan his weaknesses and more human essence.

The first thing one might notice when reading a miniseries that was first published more than two decades ago: they're not making them like this anymore. (Well, some writers may be getting close.) Claremont writes Wolverine as a man in conflict with himself. He can't ignore the super-soldier that he's been engineered into, with his "natural" mutant powers of express healing combined with the adamantium grafted to his bone structure. But he's also in love. However, he can't love a regular girl fresh off the Canadian prairie. Logan has fallen for Mariko Yashida, daughter of a violent Japanese mob boss. Early on, Wolverine heads to Japan to win her back, but he finds out that she's been married off to one of her father's goons. Wolvie doesn't take these developments lying down, and his penchant for unmerciful retribution (care of berserker mode, which comes often in this collection) leads him into major Yakuza tuft battles. Logan's actions, though generally just, don't always play out in his favor. He comes to desire two women: the unreachable, basically chaste Mariko; and the blood-lusting, hyper-violent assassin Yukio. Who's a guy to chose?

Wolverine truly becomes a fully realized character through this four-issue mini. Claremont, while given to allowing character thought bubbles reveal exposition, allows his characters to breathe and act as organically as possible. Much of Wolverine's narration is stylized noir. It's not overdone; he's not prone to alliterative poetics. Action and bad circumstances happen, and they happen often. While he goes solo in the mini (and the X-Men team show up in Japan in two included and related Uncanny issues), Logan's got plenty of demons and issues to make up for an entire team. Claremont allows the character room to breathe and grow as a man-beast that appeals to base impulses. Ugh...did I actually just use the phrase "man-beast?"
Frank Miller's art contribution can't be overstated enough. His work here might seem overly simplistic in comparison to the lush digital and painted artwork we're used to now, but his strip-down style is moodier than most of what's out there on the shelves now. The future of Sin City is clear as Wolverine battles with assassins from the Hand and with skilled Kabuki actors. The narrative would play through cleanly even without the sparse, necessary text. When Miller focuses the panel on a facial expression, the mood and feeling is clear. There's a dramatic flair to the swordplay and elegance to the fights akin to John Woo's early films. Scenes come off as carefully staged plays. While simplistic on the surface, Miller's artwork perfectly suits this best portrayal of the character.

For a Wolverine fan, this collection is a must. Claremont and Miller have develop the benchmark for the character, one where Logan isn't just a brutal member of the X-Men, but a surprisingly emotional being trying to reconcile his nature with trying to figure out what'll make him happy.

RATING: 4.5/5

hey frenchie why don't you get a real name huh

The Killer #1

Writer: Matz
Artist: Luc Jacamon
Translator: Luc Jacamon
Publisher: Archaia Studios Press
Price: $3.95

Have an unexpected real-life rendezvous with a hired hitman, and you might suddenly soil your perfectly pressed khakis. But meet the same killer in comic panels, and the same character might charm you to no end. That's certainly the case with Luc Besson's film, Leon, the Professional, a decidedly French take on the killer-for-hire story that's generously co-opted for this tale. The Killer was originally published in France (in five volumes) from 1998-2003. Archaia Studios (known lately for their publication of underground hit Mouse Guard) have brought The Killer to the states and reconstructed the material into a familiar, 10-issue series format. Take a look and you'll be glad they did.

The contract killer with a heart of gold is nearly as archetypal as the hooker with a soft spot for her most loyal Johns. Our man here isn't that guy. He's frigid like a Chihuahua left in the back yard doing a cold snap. You can't read his expressions; his speech is monotone. His understanding of his work is very simple-it's all business. It's not personal, it's just money. And once he reaches the benchmark earnings of five million dollars, he's out, off to a tropical beach house in South America where he can politely disappear. His nihilistic observation of right vs. wrong and good vs. bad allows for success in a morally deplorable profession. Our killer-impossibly common in appearance-views the whole of humanity as a collection of murderers through a history of war and imperialism. It's all justification because at the end of the day, he's breaking one of the most closely held commandments.

Certainly, writer Matz's material read differently in French, but the translation (courtesy of series artist Luc Jacamon) ably conveys the gray area this character inhabits. We get snippets of his former life as a sex-hungry student, but he gave it all up for his first job. Murder wasn't the first objective; it just sort of happened, and the Killer learned he has a penchant for the act. Not out of enjoyment or a sense of justice, but because it's easy. He gave up a lot to get there-women, education, a normal life. Matz's cold, calculated narration doesn't leave much space for dialogue. We're inside the Killer's head as he wants for his target to arrive and his work to be done. He scatters around his stakeout point, drinking beer, eating oranges, thinking of his work and future. He thinks things that we all think about, the difference being that the Killer acts on them.

Luc Jacamon's artwork is beautiful. It's muted and distinctly European in character styling. The movement of location-from Paris' crowded streets to Caribbean beaches-breathes life into the pages. Blood is splattered briefly but effectively, and the Killer's insular universe is sharp, angular and methodical. There's a palpable tension through the story, especially when the Killer goes after his mark during a scuba dive. The claustrophobic nature of the setting and sense of impending doom make for a breathless read. For much of the book, speech bubbles are unnecessary because expression and movement convey much more than words.

The familiar nature of the storyline and narration subtract from unique aspects, but above all this is nearly as good as dirt-in-your-mouth-gritty noir can get. Thank the French.

RATING: 4/5

wait there were books that didn't have to do with civil war coming from marvel last year

Annihilation: Heralds of Galactus #1

Writers: Christos Gage & Stuart Moore
Artists: Giuseppe Camuncoli & Mike McKone
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Price: $3.99

Heralds of Galactus is a new miniseries following the events of the Annihilation story line. When I say “miniseries,” I really mean “two issues.” Each issue contains two one-shot stories that act as an epilogue to the Annihilation story line, each one featuring one of Galactus' Heralds. I probably just made that sound way more complicated than it really is. Basically, there are two issues, each with two stories, for a total of four stories in the series. This issue features Terrax and Stardust. The next issue will feature the Silver Surfer and Firelord. Likewise, each story (within one issue) has a completely different creative team behind it, so I'm essentially reviewing two completely different books today. Which makes reviewing the book twice as difficult. Dammit.

It starts off with Terrax's story. During Annihilation, Terrax was under influence of mind-controlling parasites, which caused him to become an unwilling servant of Annihilus. After he is defeated, the parasites die, and no longer have control over Terrax and his two relatively insignificant companions. So of course, Terrax destroys the entire ship with his ax. They miraculously survive, and land on a nearby planet, where the local slaves immediately hit the trio for assistance in defeating their captor, the infamous “Space Parasite!” Terrax reluctantly agrees, to help them. The story wraps up with a dramatic showdown with the Space Parasite.

If the above synopsis sounded a tad ridiculous to you, you're not alone. The Terrax story plays out like an episode of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe, complete with uber-macho (aka stupid) dialogue (such as constantly announcing your attacks to your enemy in the middle of battle), and the worst abuse of proper nouns I've ever seen. I mean, “Space Parasite?” “Solar Scepter?” Give me a break. The art's not terrible, but it's nothing to write home about either. There's not much I can say about the art, because there's nothing particularly unique about it. So, basically Terrax's story leaves a lot to be desired. I think I can sum up my entire stance towards this first story by using an actual quote from it: “Moons of Xeron, is that an Elanian?” See what I'm talking about?

Thankfully the second story is much better than the first, and really saves the book from the bleak, desolate review score it would receive otherwise. The second story features Stardust, and aside from having a main character whose name sounds like something from My Little Pony, it's pretty good. As the seven people who weren't too busy having Marvel shove Civil War down their throats last summer to have actually read Annihilation know, Stardust is dead. The first few pages begin with his subconscious thoughts displayed before a lovely cosmic backdrop. He then uses the Power Cosmic to reassemble himself from the billions of pieces that he was blown into when he died, or maybe I should say that the Power Cosmic chose to reassemble Stardust, as the Power Cosmic seems to have a mind of it's own, as it then leads him to fifty-three of the surviving Etherals (who were all but wiped out by the Annihilation Wave), who intend to “prosecute” him for his crimes (him absence during the war). Stardust becomes angry with them, stating that he is far superior to them and have no place to criticize him. He them obliterates them, but, immediately regretting the decision, reabsorbs them into himself, vowing to carry their souls with him forever. He then travels to meet Galactus, who is in need of support. Stardust strives to prove his renewed loyalty to the deity by making the ultimate sacrifice.

The plot is intriguing, and the dialogue is concise but very poignant nevertheless. The artist does an excellent job portraying the vast reaches of the universe, and when the 90% of a book consists of such space, it's good to have someone who can draw it right. Ultimately, the book might be worth buying for the second story alone. Although it's a shame that a good story is pulled down by being paired with a far inferior one.

RATING: 3.5/5

Newsletter for March 6, 2007

the work of a master storyteller

PROPOSAL FOR JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA
by Brad Meltzer

I see the JLA as a broad, multiethnic group with diverse powers. The core team should, of course, be Red Tornado, supported by Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman. Green Lantern Hal Jordan rounds out the heavy hitters who can actually do things. For diversity, I have a black man and a black woman, which I think narrows it down to Black Lightning and Vixen as far as active heroes go. Is Apache Chief actually in continuity? He could round out the group. Also on the team will be Arsenal, to fill the role of being Green Arrow but not actually be Green Arrow, and Black Canary to truly make the group a mosiac of different peoples. (Attractive Blonde White Woman and Attractive Brunette White Woman).

Here are the story arcs that I have planned:

Issue 0: The "Big Three" talk about who they want on the team. Also, a bunch of random scenes for continuity nerds to endlessly obsess over.

Issues 1-6: The team begins to come together. I figure that Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman will be done looking at pictures of heroes that they want on the team by issue four. Also, we will introduce the villains the JLA will fight: Weather Wizard, Electrocutioner, Plastique, Doctor Impossible, Evil Red Tornados, Parasite, Professor Ivo, Amazo, and Solomon Grundy. This story will focus primarily on Red Tornado and his quest to become human. I figure the Big Three will stop looking at photos around issue 3 or 4. They will actually fight something in issue six.

Issues 7-10: The New Justice League is unveiled. By the end of issue 10, they will have completely announced the roster to the new JLA. It will include all of the characters on the variant cover of the very first issue. There will also be a subplot running through these issues: Female Doctor Light runs across Felix Faust, Darkseid, Prometheus, Doomsday, Mirror Master, Major Force, Captain Cold, and Psycho Pirate II. At the end of double-sized issue 10, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, and Green Lantern will beat all of the villains while Vixen thinks about how amazing they are.

Issues 11-18: Lois Lane interviews the Justice League, with their new member, Female Doctor Light! While this is happening, Mary Marvel encounters Heatwave, Pied Piper, Captain Boomerang, Gorilla Grodd, Braniac, the Top, Kalibak, Dr. Sivana, Deathstroke, the Joker, Lex Luthor, Black Manta, the Riddler, Zod, Doctor Cranial, Mr. Mind, Brainwave, Black Adam, Killer Frost, Lady Shiva, Copperhead, the Shade, Vandal Savage, Deadshot, Inertia, Professor Zoom, Bizarro, and the Penguin. In issue 18, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, and Green Lantern leave the interview with Lois Lane to go beat up all those villains while Black Lightning thinks about how awesome they are.

That takes me through the first three years, assuming the book is as constantly delayed as I hope it will be. I figure that, at that point, we will have a new Crisis-level event, and the book will be rebooted with some other "hot" writer.